numbers game

I could never be a math teacher. Or a secretary. Or anyone who has to stare at tiny little numbers and remember check lists and remembers that because so-and-so cannot sit with so-and-so and by the way, don't forget he needs this, and there are food allergies and pet allergies and we have too many chairs reserved and the wrong number of floral arrangements and I realized my father and I haven't picked a first dance song and I haven't made the seating cards and I'm not sure when the photographer will show up and five people have now backed out of the rehearsal dinner at the last minute and and maybe we'll just elope, OK?

T-minus, three days and counting.

And you know what's funny? I'm not feeling as crazy as I seem in this post; everything is easily smoothed out. Sit down, make the phone calls, one by one, then sit down with paper and glue and make the place cards. Too many floral arrangements is good. Put an extra on the head table. Wear one in your hair; no one will mind. You and your father can dance to whatever song suits you at the moment; you picked this DJ because they have a big selection, not because they were cheap.

And also amusing: it's the little details, the surrounding things, that make a bride get a little jittery before the big day. It isn't him at all. In fact, I drove up to St Paul tonight (because my ring must be inspected every six months to remain on warranty) and we went to an Irish pub for dinner (the Liffey) where I had corned beef poppers (wantons with corn beef--not helping me with the wedding dress, but that's OK) and we held hands as the sun went down. I love these kinds of surprises--we love to do this for each other--we get into the car and only the driver knows the adventure of the night, and surprise, there is always something new at the other end. Shanghai acrobats, Irish pubs, the Minneapolis symphony, an adopted cat I named Gatsby.

I will stay sane in these three days not because I am so well balanced, but because he balances me out. He is adorable and wonderful and we are in this together. I love that about him--even though he is the one working (with a second job teaching) and I am the one enjoying the teacher's summer off, he is taking on half the weight of this wedding, running errands and making phone calls, adjusting as he sees fit.

T-minus, three days.