Saturday, April 23, 2005


Ryan's mom sent me this amusing forward, and I wanted to post it here for others to read and have a laugh:

New Survivor Show
Have you heard about the next planned Survivor show?

Three businessmen and three businesswomen will be dropped into three elementary school classrooms for six weeks.

Each business person will be provided with a copy of
his/her school district's curriculum, and a class of 28 students.
Each class will have five learning-disabled children,
three with A.D.D., one gifted child and two who speak limited

Three will be labeled with severe behavior problems.
Each business person must complete lesson plans at least
three days in advance with annotations for curriculum objectives and
modify, organize, or create materials accordingly.
They will be required to teach students, handle
misconduct, implement technology, document attendance, write
referrals, correct homework, make bulletin boards, compute grades,
complete report cards, document benchmarks, communicate with parents
and arrange parent conferences.
They must also supervise recess and monitor the hallways.
In addition, they will complete drills for fire, tornadoes, and
shooting attacks.
They must attend 100 hours of workshops, faculty meetings,
union meetings and curriculum development meetings.
They must also tutor those students who are behind and
strive to get their two non-English speaking children proficient
enough to take the TEKS tests.
If they are sick or having a bad day, they must not let it
Each day they must incorporate reading, writing, math,
science and social studies into their program.
They must maintain discipline and provide an educationally
stimulating environment at all times.
The business people will only have access to the golf
course on the weekends, but on their new salary they will not be
able to afford it anyway.
There will be no access to vendors who want to take them
out to lunch and lunch will be limited to 30 minutes.
On days when they do not have recess duty, the business
people will be permitted to use the staff restroom as long as
another survival candidate is supervising their class.
They will be provided with two 40-minute planning periods
per week while their students are at activity classes.
If the copier is operable, they may make copies of
necessary materials at this time.
The business people must continually advance their own
education on their own time and pay for this advanced training
themselves. This can be accomplished by moonlighting at a second job
or marrying someone with money.
The winner will be allowed to return to his or her former job.
Pass this to your friends who think teaching is easy and to the
ones that know it is hard. They will both benefit.

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